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I used to keep an ongoing diary here but that is not so easy to keep up, so instead I may upload a monthly report or odd record to give you an insight into my world. And remember, it's my world so I can be as nutty as I like.

Now I know that there are twisted souls who will pursue me across cyber space if I have said something they disagree with on Facebook or whatever to see if they can get me into trouble of some sort. Funny how the so-called "liberals" can be so nasty. So, have a good look round and remain offended, cos as a believer in free speech I am every "ist" or "phobe" you would like to take down. 

One more thing, My blog is designed to be a long read, so make a cuppa, put your feet up and enter my world for a short while...

Blog for January:

Ok readers, lets probe the depths of Ted’s nutty world this month.

Well after all the festivities of Christmas (that mostly involved grand children running around like loonies, over-eating, getting up late and watching old films) Ted went back to work. 

So in order, that went like this: Luton, Aylesbury, Basildon, Rochester, Maidstone, Gerrards Cross, Harlow and back to Luton.

Burns Night was done and dusted at my club in Woodstock on Jan the 27th and a jolly good time was had by all. The haggis was piped in with due ceremony and we enjoyed the poor beast’s sacrifice with ‘neeps and tatties along with various spirits. Shame we have to wait another year until the next one.

In my blog for December I did say I would explore a few things to look forward to this year, so here goes.

If you are a regular reader of my blog you will have seen that myself and wife have taken quite a lot of cruises over the past few years, so this year we are going to give it a bit of a rest and focus on doing all those odd smaller trips that you mean to do but keep putting off. For instance taking the miniature railway to the top of Snowdonia.

And how about this to wet your whistle; The Dining Room of the White Swan Hotel, in Alnwick, Northumberland, is constructed from wood panelling rescued from the Dining Room from the “Olympic” the “Titanic’s” sister ship. So you can get an idea what dining aboard “Titanic” was like, as the hotel have nights where diners dress up in 1912 style and the menu is a repeat of that onboard as well. How can you resist?

I’m also looking forward to taking my motorbike out for a few more rides this year. I easily admit to being a “Fair Weather Biker” as I had more than enough of riding in all weathers when I had no choice, and can confirm that freezing wet and cold is not for me.  

My favourite thing is to ride around the local villages and countryside on a summer’s day. I don’t mind a bit of spritely acceleration and a few bendy roads (remember 007 had a girlfriend once that said “most girls would enjoy a spirited ride”), but hammering the machine flat out for long periods does nothing for me.

I also enjoy the solitude of biking, it takes us back to the time of “one man and his horse”, I definitely don’t like to run with a pack.

I also enjoy gardening (in the summer). I could hardly tell you the name of a single plant, I rely on my Commanding Officer for that, I just dig, plant and mow etc. What I do like is to dine outdoors under our pergola whenever we can and enjoy the finished result of our efforts.

At the time of writing, I’m sat in a restaurant in Luton with a karaoke session going (its not really my thing). But I must say they have just played a few oldies that I liked. One in particular caught me with a slap in the face “Gonna make this a night to remember” I’ve got a few nights to remember (some even come back and haunt me), I’m sure you have as well.

On an electrical note, I bought a Voltage Proving Unit this month. I already had one but it was quite large and didn’t look like the classic proving unit. The latter being a key point. In the world of education and training you come across many different types of people. The type I’m considering right now are the ones who have zero flexibility. They need the numbers to completely match in a calculation down to several decimal points, or you obviously don’t know what you’re talking about. They only comprehend in black or white, for these types there is no grey area or compromise.

For instance, if the test meter shown in a powerpoint presentation doesn’t match the test meter you then demonstrate they will go into hyperwobble – “does not compute, does not compute” and they are absolutely incapable of participating in the rest of the lesson.

On one occasion I had a batch of fuses for students to test as an exercise. Amongst this batch was one “dead” or “Blown” fuse to identify. On finding the dead fuse one student (who rather looked like “Plug” out the Beano) said “how did you blow that fuse?” when I told him there are usually a few laying around most fuseboards, he nearly passed out as this did not fit his vision of the universe.

So, to deal with people like this I have finally got a proving unit that matches that shown in the HSE Guidance Note GS38. And hopefully the anal retentives will be able to concentrate for at least another five minutes.

My gripe of the month is freezing cold hotel rooms. They’ve taken heaters out of the bathrooms completely and give you the great “saving the planet” BS. The only thing they’re interested in saving is money. I hate liars and bullshitters (I may have mentioned that once or twice before). 

“Greenwashing” of products or organisations really pisses me off. The only signal that sends to me is that that organisation is insincere.

I also hate corruption. Managers and co-workers taking backhanders is a plague on society. It means that projects, planning and careers all suffer for the benefit of a small greedy few. This usually means that the honest employees are overlooked for promotion and given all the rotten jobs by those corrupt managers and supervisors. Pretty much like the evil Bishop who has the ear of a King.

Then the next thing we hear is the management are having to cut overtime, or even staff as a result of “challenging financial times”. The only thing that’s bloody challenging is a group of soppy/corrupt managers that have let themselves be advised by a corrupt layer of personnel feathering their nests at the expense of others. 

When I write my memoirs, an Electrician’s version of James Herriot, I shall probably name and shame a few greedy gits I have come across.

Okay, okay, moan over. On a lighter note do you ever wake up with a tune in your head? I very often do to the odd refrain from the 1970’s, but yesterday I woke up to the full version of “Nellie the Elephant”! I reckon that was my brain sending me a subtle message that I had overdone it at Christmas.

Anyway, time to ride off into the sunset now. So mount up and make sure you ain’t got any burrs under that saddle.

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