Ok Folks here we go again (wasn’t that Archie Belle and the Drelles or something like that?)
Anyway, its funky, its weird, its off the wall, its Teddy Barrett’s Blog – The June Edition.
So where have I been this month? For the first two weeks back in Spain. Santa Susanna to be precise. We like Santa Susanna because it isn’t too tourist-like and enjoys great weather. We will either drive down through France to get there or take the ferry to Bilbao and drive across Spain (about 450 miles).
I’ve heard some people say it can take them 24 hours to “decompress” when arriving at their holiday destination before they can relax. After some of the jerks I have had to deal with I can appreciate that, but nowadays I’m about as decompressed as can be after a paella and a vino tinto. Tie that in with a few Cuba Libres and I can be very decompressed. Chuck in a couple of Grand Marniers and I can be so flat you can just slide me under the door to my room.
Anyway, returning to the UK I have been to Sawston (Cambridgeshire), Truro, Romford (x2) and back to Witney again.
Got a while back home now before returning to Spain in a month or so’s time. Trouble is it can get so bloody hot at this time of year that we go a bit further North to Estartit but that’s another story.
As this supposed to be primarily an account of my adventures in Electrical Engineering, how about this from an attendee at a recent course: “Why do I need a Safe Isolation course? I test if the supply is off or not with my finger”!
Apart from nerks like this, and generally speaking. I prefer the clientele I deal with these days as I am mostly training mature students who really do want to learn, rather than apprentices who would prefer to stab and shoot me.
But sometimes prats do still emerge (as illustrated above). I also had two guys on a maintenance course recently who simply could not take on any new concept or idea. From my earlier experiences in further education, I could tell that they were brain-damaged from smoking “Skunk” but I elected to tell the employer they were “working at the edge of their ability” and I could not recommend any further training for them at this point in time. See, I can be diplomatic if I choose.
Before moving on from this theme I must tell you about the session I once did with apprentices at Oxford College on Hysteresis and Magnetism. After about an hour of working through the subject and explaining the idea with illustrations and examples one guy at the front of the class looked up at me and said “You’re making that up”. So I shot him, stabbed him, cut him into little pieces, set fire to the bits and danced on them.
In reality, I just said “You dick. I can’t wait until next week when I meet with your boss for your appraisal and ask him why you are still here or if you are just a figment of my imagination”.
I very often get invited to run training courses in Qatar or Saudi etc. Let’s just say I don’t feel the appeal of this at the moment (running hand round neck). I’ve had some enquiries from other parts of the world though which might be of more interest.
Talking of other parts of the world, I always think that stateside single phase colours are quite logical: Black is Live, cos the bad guy always wore black. White is Neutral, because white is neutral, not a colour, and of course, Green is Earth. What I don’t get is why their 3-phase colours are Red, Black and Blue?, if anyone can enlighten me please drop me a line.
No more of “Ted’s Rules” this month. By now you must be well aware that I have no time for bullshitters, liars or just plain dickheads so ‘nuff said for the moment.
My “Person of Merit” this month is Paul Gallagher the local NICEIC inspector for Oxfordshire and environs. I first met Paul as a lecturer at Oxford College of Further Education when I was a student (mature) and I was studying for my “C” certificate. Paul always struck we as being very proficient in his chosen field but more than that, as a man of integrity. He was always very even-handed in his approach and my spies in the field tell me that as an NICEIC inspector he remains the same. I have had cause to consult him on occasion and he is always ready to help if he can. Cheers Paul, I’ll raise a dram in your honour.
My brickbat of the month goes to bullshitters and liars everywhere, you know who you are. And you know that if you have crossed me, I will trip you up whenever I can – if it takes decades or longer (see my Family page).
In closing for June, I will only quote Bill & Ted – “Be excellent to each other”.